I almost masterbated to the avatar love scene ha it was so hot
Totally forgot this... How weird was it when they were licking our faces
You spent about half an hour trying to convince me that mesh condoms were a good idea.
He came in my nose, then said it would help clear my sinuses.
Totally just met the chick getting nailed in our lobby last night. Should I bring it up?
ummm im also counting the $14 dollars I gave the old guy to pay for the cab I called for him to take to the hospital last night as part of ur present.
Unless your apartment has 3 am pancakes Im not coming over.
Ya know what's been the best part of this College Football Season? Not having to hear Brent Musberger say the Honey Badger 77 fucking times.
You declared that afternoon sex will be referred to as "wet naps" from now on
My previously white toilet seat is now hot pink. I'm not sure why or how but I know it's your fault.
As a gentleman whose genital hole is relatively small, you could imagine my reaction
1. Everyone on the 1st and 3rd floor heard you. 2. The 3rd floor vibrates when we have sex. 3. The 1st floor can hear the bed squeak.
Dennis picked up a 50 year old woman. Then he and Dan got in a fight and jumped out of the limo. No one knows what happened to them.
The viagra-rita was a sexual success and a furniture failure. He said it was the best cowgirl sex he’s ever had even with the broken couch
The same idiot-bubble, now just bigger and louder.
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