better to have posed nude and lost than to never have posed nude at all...thats what i always say
Let's play a little game of "Last Night Never Happened"
Okay, quick math test. If our entire group can do at least 6 shots a night, how much alcohol will be needed to keep us shit faced for the rest of the week? This is for a grade. Anddd, go.
She told me to act like the hulk during sex. Shit got 9 different shades of weird
Yes. I feel like complaining about sex all the time with a 21 year old might be punishable by death of the sex gods so I try not to
Well once I told her I had a girlfriend she actually got more aggressive. Then Danielle called me and she saw the pic of the two of us on my phone and immediately said "can my caller I'd pic be me sitting on your face" wtf?
I have what looks like a rubber stamp mark on my cock from last night that says "Magic Marla Approved" Do we know a Marla?
How are you getting in?
I know some influential drag queens
can we take a moment to remember my theory on 'your tongue is a snake that lives in your mouth' because we reached a whole new level of high
They are doing the auction. One of the items in the auction is a grenade launcher.
Hey I was just wondering if you could go look for my teeth?
Just got to Evans to buy weed. His mom showed up unannounced. Now the three of us are chillen. Super.
You are the ghost of drunk bitches past, present, and future.
I asked him if we were going to get arrested for doing it in the bar parking lot. "Absolutly not" said the guy getting the blow job...
i just got carded for condoms. wtf.....this is new. isnt safe sex a good thing?
Randomize
