Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
I woke up and my panties were thumbtacked to his wall. Out of my reach.
he pissed his pants, and she still wants to hook me up with him. I try not to date guys with bladder control problems... Unless they're loaded anyway.
I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
Five things that make you perfect. Go.
The skin of a dead hooker. The blood of the innocent. The soul of a kitten. The hat from cat in the hat. And sunglasses.
Just saw a man being put through a dui test on the side of the road... it was noon and he was on a bicycle. God bless texas.
you are hot. that is all.
who is this?
the delivery driver from silvermine.
Just had a random flashback of you tickling some guy's nipple with your claw ring, and then him moaning and stripping in the middle of the bar. You give good memories.
He smells so good today
Seriously, back away from the sexual harrasment suit.
Strike three, the fat brides maid they call shit puker also has herpes.
Why did the fire extinguisher taste lemony?
Come make me food. I feel like if I go in the kitchen I will just get Gin.. and pass out in there.
"Accidentally" bump into him after class.
I'm gonna "accidentally" put his dick in my mouth.
He called me khaleesi while I rode his dick. He wins
Who the fresh hell put 2 pillows a raincoat and a guitar on top of me to keep me warm last night
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