I'm at a crab and wine festival with my dad. He just introduced me as his girlfriend to all of his co-workers. I am so drunk I thought he was serious.
I guess there's some 16 and under softball tournament and they all are at my work. what is a 21 year old to do?
The responsible thing...show them the break room.
so today I found out that she used to be a he....
are you gonna get a divorce?
you ever feel like there is a sober person insided you pointing and laughing....?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We had sex on the hood of my car and broke the windshield.
Well he's not exactly single.. It's like an open relationship his wife doesn't know about
My ex just called and told me that he is on his way to the hospital because he popped a vein in his dick. Should I go to the ER with him or class?
Ever find yourself wondering if your life is God's way of telling a joke?
Went kayaking. drunk. DID NOT FALL IN. Mission succesful.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I mean it was fine and all but I just don't understand why a man would need all that Simon Cowell paraphanelia
Well start with a list of things you don't want to do... Like maybe 1) I don't want join Isis. That's a good start.
i mostly like you because you have a nice nose and that's an important trait to pass on to my future children
You had me at "let me see your balls"
I told him I was on my period but he says "I'm a doctor, you think I can't handle blood?" And just went for it. Jackpot
You know how fear has a smell? Well turns out shame has a smell too. It's Pina colada flavored anal grease.
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