sorry if i was weird last night, had weird deja vu that we had done that before, i mean with the peanut butter.
we had.
well that explains the rash. i dont think i should see you again.
He cooked the food on a paper plate in the oven.
Everytime she would start slurring, she'd stop, hold up a finger, wait like 30 seconds, then try again. I love drunk people
seriously my hangover is so bad I feel like my eye lashes make blinking a workout
Man, I thought my dick was gonna fall off.
Dude, I didn't even think they made slap bracelets anymore. You okay?
Trying to figure out which chair my head was under last night
last night i reached the point where my boob implants paid for themselves in free drinks. to celebrate lets go out and get more free drinks tonite.
Like I actually don't feel all that great but the fact that I'm not projectile vomiting at work makes life seem so magical
I think I maybe realized he was too old for me when I went into his bathroom and he had anti aging face cream.
I'll call it a tollerance break and either will be celebrating my new job with a bowl or will be smoking my sadness away from not getting the job. Either way.
A guy just picked up ur brother and carfied him away singing and im slight concern
wasn't that the evening we made out with the girls from the dental school, drank 3000 beers, almost had to beat up a guy at the strip club and James nailed some hot piece of tail and took her OSU windbreaker, which my dad went on to wear multiple times after finding it in the garage.
Yes. To all of that. Yes.
Campus scavenger hunt! and by scavenger hunt I mean all the pharmacies are sold out of Plan B.
i hooked up with all four beatles on halloween get on my level
I fished a Couples Masturbation DVD out of somebody’s trash and kept it. That’s how desperate I am.
Randomize
