what's Bukake?
a bad idea.
"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
theres bread in your mailbox im going to eat it
nevermind its newpaper
So thanks to the xanax and vodka memory erasering combo i wake up only to reopen a picture of some very familiar balls
They thought "watering it down" meant adding more vodka
My Yoga instructor is playing the music from 'Requiem for a Dream' it makes me very reluctant to put my ass in the air
We still on for coffee?
Cream and sugar. Deliver to planned parenthood in 45.
Your biggest crisis right now is that you can't decide whether to keep hooking up with AN NFL PLAYER or try to rekindle your relationship with your ex. You are a walking white girl problem.
And the view of you in reverse cowgirl is arguably the most spectacular view ever... And I've seen the Eiffle tower, the colosseum, mountains of Hawaii, Michaelangelo's David, and the Mona Goddamn Lisa. Just saying.
We watched X-Files, ate pizza, and he played with my butt. It was a pretty standard Monday.
I think I just got booty called by someone I've never slept with or even really had a conversation with before.
dude if looks could fuck you two would've been naked in front of everybody
I don't know which is weirder: that she was old enough to have a live-in son close to my age, or that the woman he was with was close to hers
Actually new year, new me. I haven’t had sex yet so technically I’ve been a virgin all year.
My hands smell like vagina and ham.
Randomize
