Oh yes. The girl who wanted me to watch her pee.
is it true you fucked a yoga instructor last night??! ..and let me know if you want me to post that question on your facebook so kelly can see how happy you are without her
i should start naming my morning wood
great idea but wrong number
I just wnated to let you know that I laminated my history notes so i can study in the shower.
I lost my virginity in that bed. You just layed in history.
If I have to go to the hospital can we stop by the liquor store on the way?
Taking shots out of pine wood derby trophiesssssss. best idea ever.
Monday: I just need a drink Tuesday: OMG no more this week! Wednesday: oh shit how'd I get drunk Thursday: I'm glad you've stopped the pretenses
judging by her collection of mens sweaters, shes fucked the entire lands end catalog.
and i'm going to kill you for what you did to my nipples last night. of course i want to hang out
I really hope you are not drunk feeding a raccoon.
I seriously had to check my phone this morning to make sure I didn't agree to any strange sexual favors.
Somehow it went from suicide to pierced nipples. I think we're good.
We woke up in the room with a hamburger patty on the bed side table, one bun across the room, and the other bun under my pillow. Still don't know who ordered room service.
She had a glow in the dark pastie on her forehead the last time I saw her. That should help you find her.
Randomize