It was still light ouot when we were walking up Pier Ave and she kept asking if she could suck my nipples.
question: masturbation: how much is too much? I think i'm about to tip toe a fine line
An ex-gang member just asked me out on a date via note. And spelled dinner wrong. Win?
so...dinner was kid's cuisine and a bottle of wine. i think they go well together.
i don't have fun when you have fun. i have embarrassment, fear, and significantly less cash in my wallet.
I am no longer a man. I just realized I prefer Spongebob to college football.
he was banged his ex for coke the whole time and is still the best guy so far this year. standards need to be raised.
New game I thought of while bored on the train. Anytime I get a text from an ex, I will randomly text a different ex. It's like a less charitable version of pay it forward.
I think i was just meant to be a stripper. A ballerina stripper cat
Everyone here knows me as 'that chick who will most likely steal your girlfriend'. My 99% success rate tells me this name is acceptable.
And I'm determined to make an Eiffel Tower happen sometime. I just don't know who will take the pic (first world sex problem?)
Don't be offended, the only thing I'm attracted to right now is snack cakes and chicken wings.
Well I can cross 'get my dick slathered in coconut oil while watching the bob's burgers porn parody' off my bucket list.
Also my roomate used some of my condoms so she gave me her hummus. Great trade
She sent me a thank you card for not fucking her boyfriend...
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