Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
You should dream of me :)
I'm going to dream of single life.
just upper decked a verizon store cause they don't cover against "getting phone crushed by a keg." had to pay 175 for a new one
It was honestly like finding a clitoris in a haystack.
Thanks for not cleaning the drain like you were supposed to. I just vomited in the shower and I had to stand in it until I was done conditioning.
Still borderline I believe. As bad as this sounds, I feel God owes me one here and should not let his grandmother die till after my birthday
When the doctor said the anal leakage might not be reversible without some lifestyle changes you start asking if it's worth the entertainment value.
The only thing I regret was that he was wearing a scarf when we made out.
Quote of the night award goes to my father "I like wearing my swim trunks around the house because they are cooler and more blousy for my balls". Yay dad
Last time i carry you out of a forest
He spelled Steven with "ph", needless to say my nose was almost bleeding from the amount of axe he was wearing.
To be fair I went my whole first week without showing up to work drunk!
So red wine goes with eggs, right? Because that's all I have in the house to cook and the drinking options are either wine or scotch
Hypothetically speaking of course, is it bad if a cat eats lube?
I have had flashes of 69ing, a strawberry flavored condom and begging him to sleep naked.
Randomize
