I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
It didn't get weird until she took off her underwear, looked down, and said "fill her up!"
i know and i thought i was only capable of loving dick and drugs, im so happy
Besides the whole peeing blood for a week thing, it was the best sex of my life.
Your friend who drunkenly cleaned the kitchen just wished the class a Happy National Tutu Day. While wearing a tutu. Make a move or I'm gonna marry her.
Listen, don't freak out when you walk out on me masturbating in front of my roommate. No homo. He just needs to be put to his place.
You were on shrooms and "the trees are crazy green!" is all you could manage.
Just woke up with an eye that wont open, a half eaten piece of pizza on my chest and a raging boner.
Question: should I be considering heels or is this the kind of night where I should plan on falling on my face regardless of my choice of footwear?
Just saw a guy I fucked in a clown suit in the bar. It's not Halloween. I have got to start making better life decisions.
He's slurring his text. I didn't think that was possible.
We made out and he didn't grope me. I liked it. I felt like I was innocent again.
And the next thing I knew I was blowing this random hot italian bartender with an uncircumcised penis in his work closet
Btw you guys passed out eating DP dough and watching Pocahontas... on a monday
it was stoner heaven..
Whats a little breast milk between friends?
Randomize
