is it sad that i think every plant i pass on the highway looks like a plant from farmville?
Married on the beach in PCB while blackout drunk. Bonged beers on the sandbar for a bachelor party. They shotgunned beers at the end of the vows. How is spring break allowed to happen?
In case you were wondering, transporting lube in a ziploc bag is just as bad of an idea as it sounds.
We are probably going to have to use your boobs as currency to get this done
I have a king size bed, I guarantee multiple orgasms, and I'll give you a ride home in the morning. Respond quickly.
It was kinda hard to explain to his wife why there was chocolate syrup on the ceiling.
In brighter news I got condoms and a mattress protector today.
Watching him is like watching a star slowly implode
I'm taking a leave of absence and sending myself to fat camp. I'll let you know when I'm out.
My booty call fought through ice and a foot of snow to get here. He brought booze, food, and cigarettes for three days. My vagina is the greatest motivator of all time.
So he got the TA job but i told him its not official until we have a quickie on his desk. He offered to break into his office. He doesnt start until this fall.
I'm proud of you for choosing to be an organ donor on your fake!!
My roomate had an hour long melt down about her life choices not realizing I was in the middle of having sex... So yea it went pretty horribly.
So the bar crawl I'm on is a "90s bar crawl" and I made the joke about a few overweight girls that "lack of concern for your weight is so 90s" it did not end well
a reward? ill think of something
if its not drugs or food I swear to god ill throw a fit
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