i think guys can sense when i'm not wearing underwear
Single schmingle. No one actually obeys the relationship boundaries these days. Its 2009.
I just sneezed and it tasted like taco bell.
It's really too bad Cosmo doesn't have "What To Do When You've Drunkenly Sucked His Dick and He Doesn't Text You Back" article.
i threw up in a box in my own lap driving today.
Breaking up as roommates was a poor life decision. I'm sorry. Thank you for never shitting on the floor.
I decided tomorrow is going to be great day wether my period likes it or not
It feels like I'm breathing out my heart and it spreads through my limbs to my fingertips.
there isn't one for "I'll give you an I'm sorry blowjob" but that's also an option you have. in the meantime here is an emoticon of a caterpillar
I like that we've become good enough friends again that I can make fun of your penis without it being awkward
Dude best one night stand i woke she was cleaning our fridge while waiting for the cab to show
he's the second guy to suck on my nipple in front of my friends that i haven't made out with.
This guy on the bus keeps leaning over and sniffing my hair.
Fuck you and fuck your stupid hat
someone commented on last weekends photos impressed that so many homeless people wanted to take pictures with us. weird that those "homeless people" are our friends... right?
Randomize
