wrigley field is MILF paradise
Why do all fat girls have "that smell"?
chicago's viagra triangle is not unlike the bermuda triangle in thatt things just get lost...... planes, ships, dignity, virginity, etc.
I'm gonna have bed sores at the end of this hangover.
I'm playing the Jersey Shore drinking game by myself at my mom's house. Things like this are not okay after college.
So she comes up to me at the end of the night and asks me if I going to take her home and fuck her. I pretty much had to right?
you had an obligation.
they're using the ping pong table for ping pong. it's weird
literally hosing herself off in my back yard with the hose. i offered her the shower but she refused. that drunk.
I'm not taking advise from someone who responded to the pickup line "I have a penis"
I sang "A Whole New World" while I took his virginity
That is awesome that you did that.
I mean I kinda plunged vagina first into my last relationship
Just fat and dog and sweat all over the bed. All night long.
"I'm 95% straight," he says. Cut to him on his knees...by far the most beautiful guy I've ever fucked.
omg so there's this guy on the roof and he just stripped for no reason and now i think he's making out on the rooftop with some other guy? who are these people
Hi I love you will you be up for a while!
That exclamation point was a drunk decision
Randomize
