So... how did lowering your standards work out last night?
I am in shape. i keep telling you that.
Round is not "in shape," it's "a shape."
i want to open my blinds to let the sunlight in my room, but i'm afraid my neighbors will be able to see me drinking and judge me
Xanax and allergy medicine look a lot alike when you spill them on the floor. Just saying that I still have allergies but I'm unsure if I still have legs
Writing apology letters and leaving them on peoples doors for your actions is NOT what I want to be doing at 6am.
If you fuck her, Im going to call you and I want you to cough 2 times.
...Saturday night. Get your dick ready. We are going to go nuts. I want to have sex fucking everywhere.
And after we were done he said "Let's play a game! Who can find their clothes first"
It's now 8:05 on a Wednesday night and I'm already going home with my bra in my purse.
As long as I don't spend the half the week passed out/fucked up on Klonopin and no one dies, this will be the best week I've had all semester.
Who gives a hand job to a 19 yr old one night then the next lets a 31 year old random man fly a plane to town and pick u up and take u to dinner?
I had to write an apology letter to my roomate for hotboxing in our bathroom. What a bitch.
I came home in someone else's underwear this morning
Atleast you got a souvenir
A guy in a chewbacca suit just came up to me and asked me to buy him weed.
Flirting with/getting ready to possibly sleep with a married HS classmate and getting added to a bible study group chat within minutes of each other. #Balance
Randomize
