I just made a milkshake without a blender... thats determination
i called my brother from the living room and paid him a dollar to turn off the light in my room. ive hit rock bottom
Mass Text: Free blowjob to first person to bring me a nacho cheese chalupa.
You know you stopped at a liquor store to prepare for a 12-year-old's birthday party, right?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Holy christ fuck what has my trainwreck of a life come to just blew a 17 year old so help me god
NO. NO LET HIS PENIS TOUCH YOU.
I'm getting flash backs of last night. They're coming in song form.
Im sorry that my initial plan of you grabbing his dick didnt work out but Im glad you grabbed his heart
My arms are hairy. And so Is my left leg. Just my left leg, the right is smooth.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just shit my pants and had a heart attack. Simultaneously. May or may not be related to this game.
Well you know I have tits so that's half the battle
I sense lesbianism
That's a weird power
...and now I welcome the sweet embrace of death.
I came so hard I literally levitated off the top of his dick. Gravity was no match for that orgasm!
I'm drunkenly throwing popcorn at a spider, fuck him. Why does his scary 8 legs get to be happy?
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