using no condom is gross. my vagina has a dress code.
So. Did i wake up at 430, try to drive home, stop to throw up at a shell, and try to clean out my car and drop my keys in a full dumpster? Yes.
im goin to the NYE party with a tuxedo painted on my body. i know a girl who does it. wanna join?
Had a couple pieces of pizza for breakfast...suck on that Jamie Oliver.
You know you hit rock bottom when you make out with a guy named after a cereal.
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
I'm sexting at the thanksgiving dinner table...this is a new holiday tradition.
Hey when you wake up and read this, we really need to stop pullin our dicks out when we drink dude. I have all the pics, yall are assholes
I asked for a steak knife but the waitress could see in my eyes it was a bad idea
Oh and Dustin informs me I'm a legend amongst the freshman, if you were wondering about my street cred
She throws back shots like they are NO-THING. I swear, she goes through like five straight tequila shots, does a jello shot, chases with half a hot dog, has a rum and coke, and then takes her shirt off and makes an impromptu bandage out of it for fuckin' Tim who cut himself on the flagpole. I'm going to marry her.
OK, but next time I'd like to be present for our make-up sex.
Doing the walk of shame from the back of a Jeep to the porta potty it's parked next to while your dad watches is not what you want.
Last thing googled on my laptop last night was vagina chaffing. What the fuck?
A girl I had a drunken hook up with is on interventon right now
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