Dude that chick in the corner just threw up
Hot
So she said grabbing my cock was like holding a giant crayola from pre-school.
that was the beginning of the end.
I drank gravy. I actually drank gravy. This is heaven.
Just smoked a bowl with the exterminator. I think my day is more productive.
He was going nice and slow, then he yelled " BOONNEESTOORRMM!!!!!". I can't walk straight.
I am currently google image searching dick piercings, trying to see what I'm getting myself into.
There was a lot going on. It was easy to miss a 70 foot tall puppet.
I've gotta stop getting kicked out of bars for fighting with people over the accuracy of the Harry Potter movie.
Drunkkker than when I told the drag queen she was prettier than me
he suggested we do it doggy style cuz it was his dead dogs birthday...i had to do it
Very excited! Vodka will be shot, dicks will be ridden, and memories made.
My entire summer has consisted of being too drunk for this shit, too sober for this shit, or too hungover for this shit.
My condoms might be a little big for you but hey, a big sweater is better than no sweater at all when it's cold right?
Can I just swipe right on his dad?
She played the piano. I played the piano. She got on top of the piano. I got on top of her.
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