hi i'm bored and kind of... in a sort of dirty mood
pics
no i'm at a mixer dressed up as the teenage mutant ninja turtles
would it be inappropriate to describe you with the phrase "bigass titties"?
ok so hold on... from what i hear... thank you... i'm sorry... and your welcome.
Theres also beggin' strips and a dog bone in the corner...nooo signs of there being a dog though.
..She then engaged in what she called an "interpretive pole dance"
Most awkward car ride ever. Kid in the front seat was bawling, 2 in the backseat were ready to fight, and I was giving the last kid a handie. This needs to stop happening to us.
I'll start choreographing the sperm rain dance now
Omg. Some dude is jacking off in Kelly's bathroom.
He is the blood diamond of hook ups. You think you want it...but you don't
I don't miss having sex with him. We had our finale fuck last week. He's all yours now.
How did I roll 7 times this month and survive?\nI must be some sort of ecstasy goddess
It's been awhile, you pregnant yet?
he left a full can of coors light underneath my windshield wiper, like a love note. if that's not husband material, i don't know what is
Well I've consulted some psychics but they keep saying all they hear in my head is screaming and all they see in my future is pool noodles and cheese dip?
I added our drug dealer to the quickbooks software babe, he is listed under vendor's as an expense category... money management is such a bitch...
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