There is an asian family here, I heard the mom call her son onyong
For real. Like, if I ever had to choose a last meal, I would just choose to get high and eat whatever was around.
I've only been here for an hour and I've already made 6 babies cry.
Happy Birthday
I wonder if he just picks random boners to send or just the realy impressive ones
If I don't wake up hungover in a ditch Monday morning I will consider my halloween a failure
do you think semen can infect my impacted wisdom tooth
It's totally ok to sleep with him. The only place I have feelings for him is in my vagina.
I hit on her. So did Sarah. Neither of us got anywhere. I swear she's asexual. Like Switzerland.
on my way to nyc to take a survey about my sexual activity. if you dont hear from me for a few days, assume they had me committed...
I had to rip your toilet paper for you...
It's that moment where you find out the girl you've been dating for 6 months is a mob daughter. Post breakup.
I hope you have a dream of a sloth with my face touching you erotically
Oh my god he's laying on a longboard singing the song from cool runnings.
I knew it was going to be good when he took off my bra and I only realized 5 minutes later
He's gonna do me a solid for doing her a solid. It's like pay it foward. But with sex.
Randomize
