He told me he looked up all the foods that make cum taste better and he put it all on his moms shopping list. she came through my line. this ones a keeper I think.
don't wear any deodorant. we have to do everything we can to sabotage this wedding
I have no idea what i drank..i remember dancing and ass grabbing..u falling. Headbutts. Trying not to puke. And deja vu.
Drunk lesbians having an argument about their realationship isn't as hot as I imagined.....
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You're the only person I know who would say "we'll play it by ear" referring to a threesome
Because it is about to snow, I sent him for Diet Coke and cigarettes. It's the gay version of milk and bread.
sex in a tree stand. check.
you lucky bastard
He told me I was 100% better then porn then passed out nto the cake
Always wear a seatbelt when giving road head. I think I'm just going to tell people I don't remember how I got the fat lip.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hey, met you at the bar last night. You probably dont remember my name. You and your friends came back to my place, you shattered my window with your fist then dipped. Your gonna need to pay for that.
Thats where this cut came from! Thanks for piecing together the puzzle dude.
Wesley I'm sober and my body hurts. There wasn't much trust in any of those falls.
saying, "have a good fall!" After fucking a virgin boy is good etiquette, right?
Dude...are you really going to start sexting during our friend's memorial service?
I just realized. I havent even gotten a paycheck from this new job yet and already laid one of the girls most of the dudes are after
Well when you come back we can have a huge bitch fit...or get really drunk....whichever comes first
Randomize