Sooo i definitely have a major burn on my chin from kenny's ...stubble from making out for hours while coked up. Pure class.
i just walked passed a table of guys by myself.. they looked @ me talked and then yelled 7
id pin you as more of an 8
Sooo, his balls are like... bigger than my head...
You lit the bowl with a rolled up paper towel that you ignited on the stove.
I just was on a 20min team conference call where I didn't speak, I used a Gus Johnson soundboard online to answer questions asked to me...the highlight of 2010
This is the time you want your cat to have telepathy with you. To know if the guy downstairs left.
There's just something about a dollar tree pregnancy test that screams THIS WASNT PLANNED!
I mean you guys are my friends and all but if you fuck with me I will not hesitate to set you on fire
Im hitting on this chick at a stoplight when all the sudden. i notice this chick blowing some dude in the backseat.
I had her buy me a cock ring, so we might test that out. We are presently playing yahtzee.
Cock rings and yahtzee. Like peanut butter and jelly.
I'm so glad you support me having casual sex with your uncle
If I remember correctly I tried to steal a mail truck last night
One day I'm gonna have to send my roommate a "sorry I got high and forgot you were in the room and masturbated next to you" fruit basket
How in the fuck did you get LIVE MOTHER FUCKING BATS!?!?! Into my ROOM last night????
be the chaos you wish to see in the world...
i'm trying to figure out how to respond to that in text
Randomize
