Yeah unless I can find some idiot to make love to
When you told me you were coming to my show, I didn't know you were bringing Satan and Brokeback Mountain with you.
you got kicked out last night because right after you said "whats up?" to us, you downed your whole vodka ton and threw it across the bar.
Why didn't you tell me that Dad was a registered sex offender?
We were going to tell you eventually, how'd you find out?
Our school resource officer showed us how to use Family Watchdog and pulled up his picture.
I hope you fall in a pool of honey in an immensely populated region of bears.
I want a meaningful relationship and i wont get one if i keep giving him blow jobs in my basement while watching family guy.
My goal tonight is to get arrested because what cop can say they have ever arrested a giant sperm before. God I love halloween
Since i didn't have a condom I told him to use jump ship method, I think I was overly invested in my sailor costume this year.
you know what would be perfect? if you flew in on a horse/cat holding taco bell and then you swooped me up and took me to disney world and it was magical
Saying I've had more balls in my mouth than you is the last clear, coherent thing I remember.
Do me a favor and don't mention him I feel like Regina George and I just want to scream I made him
This really high kid past out in the corner of the room holding a box of cheez its in his arm. My idol.
He's such a neat freak that he started making the bed while I was still laying on it naked. He succeed in case you were wondering.
Sorry I've been a slutty nightmare this week
I am dancing alone in my bathroom because I was paranoid the neighbors were watching through the windows
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