I need a slap back to reality. Or at least a slap back to homosexuality
So, someone in Olympia stole my credit card # last week and bought a platypus vibrator with it. That’s it.
I could write a book called "things that come out of my vagina"
On this egg donor form, it asks "In the past 5 years, have you had sex for drugs or money?" It only gives a yes or no option and no place to explain myself. What do I do?
I took her to see 2012 then broke up with her, the movie was a metaphor.
Maybe you should go over there and lead him on and reach down his pants like he's about to get some and yank his balls.
That's the best idea I've heard all day.
Making the executive decision for drunk you to not sleep in the lofted bed that has no ladder
She made out with me for a free sandwich. What makes you think she is NOT up to my standards?
the australian girl literally just drank an entire pitcher of beer in about twenty seconds. i want to go to there.
We JUST got rid of the new years fatties at my gym and now the spring break fatties are here. goddamn.
Tried to dry my shoes in the oven last night.
How early is too early to study with margaritas?
I almost died in that meeting. Nearly dried up and blew away in the pure powder form of boredom
I know that feel bro
that almost beats the chick I saw smoking a joint while uni-cycling past my house at 4am. Almost.
My feelings for him are donzo molonzo but I can't turn down a pierced penis...
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