sorry I missed your bday party.,I was vid chatting with that new guy I'm talking to all night...happy biirthday though
My little brother has some high school girls in my pool, it's like a jailbait buffet in my backyard
closing bar tabs have helped me with simple math in college.
I was so high I thought there were pigeons in my room. Long story short there are now donut crumbs all around my bedroom.
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I don't know what I wash first. My body or my puke painted car. People are judging me as I drive by.
It's official, I need to start putting my vagina's needs before my own.
ill give you food and tequilla and penis and joy
I just spent a pre-4th of july celebration riding in a raft being towed by a car through a town that I've never heard of handing out flyers for a river rafting company that I never knew existed. Good night.
I've actually, minus lsat night have actually changed my drinking habits
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i think you may have a shot to cock block in a moment. just saying.
Wake up an cock block please bc these are noises i dont ever want to hear again
why is there a chinchilla in our apartment, and where did it come from?
question nothing. DON'T QUESTION A FREE CHINCHILLA.
She complimented my boobs and then told me I smelled like teddy bears before falling asleep on the floor.
do you think our homemade porn will pass for my cinematography final?
After a while I was so wet that I started crying. HE MADE ME SO HORNY I WEPT.
Ugh... The hoe gods giveth and the hoe gods taketh away.