It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
i jus seen this fat chick walk buy look like she had don king coming out her arm pits..
Weirdest conversation with my dad. He just told me he didn't shave his pubes.
Her boobs were tiny. I could have used her bra as a blind fold. Which in hindsight would have made things a lot better.
Just whacked off in the middle of writing a paper, gave me great ideas. Note, should do this more often.
She has her iPod in her ears slippers and sweats on and is walking around the house up and down the stairs getting "exercise" she just stopped for a water break
I just peed next to my dog in the yard. Unparalleled forms of bonding going on over here.
I froze in his sixty one degree room but i came so hard. Like fucking the eskimo god.
Some guy thought i was the waitress and handed me his credit card. drinks on me.
I was mid-sentence and you stopped me and said, "Yeah.. for my vaginas sake, I'm gonna need you to stop talking right now."
Oh jesus...leave it to you to hit on not one but two guys who can't fuck you till marriage.
I'm not entirely sure that the guy that just texted me is not on drugs right now. I'm also not entirely sure that he isn't about to be incarcerated.
Trust me, dating 38 and 20 year old dudes at the same time is the best. Money plus all of the sex. Finally figured out this relationship thing.
Status: mom bitching about grandma not shutting the fuck up, while not shutting the fuck up. Dear Jesus give me strength or more bourbon.
cake and sex. what better combination is there.
Randomize