She told me a very interesting story, complete with pantomimes, about how she got a habanero seed in her vag
she was so hung over that i had to hold her hair while she puked in a trash can in the middle of the student center as new freshman and their parents walked by.
filled out health questionnaire for lower premiums a little bit too honestly. Literally got assigned a life coach.
I can't ever handle being "that girl" again. At least not until next semester.
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For his 21st I'm getting a fancy hotel that way he can at least sleep in a nice bathtub
fireball beer pong. youre missing out
how is that even possible?
ove gloves.
be there in ten.
I feel like college is just an experience in what names I can't name my future son.
I think there's a website warning girls about me based on the 4 who approached me separately tonight and called me evil. Fuckyoudave.com?
I vaguely remember stopping for a bag of bugles and some lube and then I woke up this morning with melted chocolate on my hands. I think I love him
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This teachers last name is pfister and she did the fisting motion to help explain how to pronounce her name. This class might be good
She kept grabbing my head and told my faces to stop shaking.. Also, she kept whispering something about seeing flowers in my eyes.
I was so drunk that I passed out before I could do or say anything I'd regret. My low alcohol tolerance is like a guardian angel.
You know your Halloween costume is slutty when you have to shave your pubes to wear it.
taking shots alone in my kitchen before I go learn to give a lapdance. when did this become my life?
my very deepest apologies for the unintentional cock block.
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