marko just referred to some fat asian and a portly friend as Jupiter and one of its moons. unreal. hyte!
I just found glass in my funny face pancakes, there's nothing funny about that.
I'm not a pervert.. I just like to be naked...
I wonder if he just picks random boners to send or just the realy impressive ones
Did your dad mention the fact that you asked him for viagra at 2 in the morning?
I just woke up at my desk with "To Whommmmmmmmm" typed on a letter. I have no memory of waking up, getting dressed or driving in.
Congrats to the girl that left her positive preggo test in the bathroom...
I have no idea. I woke up naked on someones toilet locked in the bathroom with two baby kittens.
you made sure you came back for your bottle of vodka but didn't remember to take your shoes
He kept coming back from the bar with hotter girls and just left with two...I feel like I just witnessed something amaZing. Like meeting Jesus and finding out he has no morals either
He referred to his cock as "The cock" like it was third party or something.
It's only 10 in the morning...josh is already on the way to the ER for trying to shotgun a beer with a sparklers sticking out of it on fire.
Well you finally jumped into that tree you've always wanted into and some girl gave you an 8.5. You were very happy.
Well I have rug burns in both armpits, somehow. So yes you should have been here
You're going to be mad because I got baked, but not that mad because I'm bringing home kfc.
Randomize
