jackpot. dress really slutty so he knows you mean business
Its only tuesday and I need a dd home from work. This is getting too easy.
If you're wondering about the pepper everywhere its for the ants and it was my doings. They hate pepper. You're welcome.
Well, he has like 3 girlfriends but I think I could be polygamist for that dick.
Travelers Top-Tip: Europeans do not appreciate being repeatedly referred to as "gypsy" regardless of how good your Borat impression is.
Did you sleep with Connor? And who undressed me? There's a picture of two guys peeing out my bedroom window. What happened?
You're lucky you got out when you did, about an hour later the girl in the Franzia box started wrestling everyone.
Hey sorry for being annoying last night, I just realized how many times I yelled "JORDAN!" during and after playing pong.
I don't remember, but I believe your goodnight phrase was "nice meeting you, thanks for not macing me"
17. The number of times my one night stand told me he loved me.
Had the best sex Thursday night then Friday night I met his girlfriend. The worst thing is we became friends like she gave me her number.
Car is still out of commission. Looks like it's Grape Nuts and scotch for dinner.
i feel like every weekend turns into a giant blur of i dont want to know...
I'm just really glad SD weather is so erratic so I can get away with wearing a scarf in May to cover up these hickeys.
When have you ever know me to go too far?
Besides the alcoholism, the HR issues, and getting fired from Best Buy for tackling a display?
Yeah. Besides those.
Randomize
