After last night's events, I googled "how to change your life direction." I found a really helpful ehow.com article.
needless to say, I hope she has to get an abortion again
I need to move out. I just walk of shamed my way into a family breakfast party. There's no response when grandma says "where you coming from in heels at 9AM?"
Just looked at my outgoing calls. Seems I had a 7 minute convo with my 10th grade english teacher at 2:56 am Saturday...
Dude i think i got lasagna in my eye
at the last minute we also decided to throw an egg in the beer bong. and he drank it, shell and all.
full cup flip cup was not exactly the reason I wanted to tell the cops when I was sleeping on the curb
Ok, Jen and I are going out tonight and getting rowdy. I think you and Steph need to come. I understand if you can't, but not going out means you're automatically obligated to post bail. If necessary.
All I remember is waking up with 3 penises pointed at my face. I also remember enjoying that a lot. And then I threw up in their shower.
I'm about to fuck a girl in an old school Tony Kukoc Bulls jersey. About to earn my third championship ring in sex
Yeah man i woke up and only had a Jimmy John's wrapper covering myself..
My name will be tattooed on his ass by sunday.
YOUR VAGINA IS SO CUTE IT'S LIKE A LITTLE MACAROON
You can be responsible and still be on that ho life
And you hate the library
Yea but I love drugs and my grades
Randomize
