After last night's events, I googled "how to change your life direction." I found a really helpful ehow.com article.
I just found a beer bottle in my xmas tree while disassembling it. God, I'm going to miss the holidays.
I come up with the best drinking games while babysitting
I am too drunk to make real decisions. I had pop rocks all over my ass earlier. This is not a joke.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He showed up drunk to my cousions HS grad party, we stayed at the bars till 2, then he got up at 5 to run a half marathon and by the time I woke up wlhe was already back and drinking.
Look. You've gotta stop making this about you, and make it about my vagina.
Is "incoherent" a legit goal to strive for tonight? Or should I stay sober enough to fuck who I can?
I would have gladly let him decapitate me with the way he was biting on my neck.
At least I'm fat on the outside. You can NEVER change being fat on the inside.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'll text you later. I think she thinks we're taking this whole "no sex" thing seriously.
stoners and superglue do NOT mix
New discovery: your vibrator works on my balls. Technology is wonderful I love the future
I knew it was Christmas when someone handed me a stocking filled with airplane bottles. Ps just woke up 3 days later
I'm excited for him and his new girlfriend. I'm just going to miss his penis is what I'm saying.
how do you feel about japanese?
I would eat half a street meat hotdog I found on the sidewalk, I'm good with anything.
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