should I fuck that poor girl
no dude she won't be able to afford a fucking abortion
i knew she was high when she broke up the cookies into her glass of milk and ate it like cereal
Drinking at work by myself... My boss just walked into me copying my face on the copy machine..
Take your time, they're doing body shots off the dog.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They're here. One showed up as a slutty Crayola, and I think the other came as The Fat Friend.
There was a guy running for some position in our government named "young boozer" hell yes I voted for him
Just saw the stripper pole on the road that we threw out of the party bus last night
What's grosser: using a dirty sex towel as an oven mitt? or using the oven to reheat superbowl bean dip for dinner?
The lady sitting right behind me on the bus has baby birds in her purse. Shes feeding them bugs from a cup with a pair of tweezers... I love san francisco!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
yea talk to her if you feel up to it. Just remember who you are
Oh shit sorry I just gave lion king advice sorry not mufasa
Sorry for the milk in the bathroom. I was washing mace out of the one security guys eyes
She wanted me to stick my dick in the birthday cake she got me
I wanted one last NYC adventure and I got it. Now I just have to figure out a polite way to wake up the pantless former stripper illegal Russian immigrant street violinist chick currently in a vodka coma in my bed.
hey, just so we're clear, next time we go swimming drunk at my house, we have to use the floating chairs instead of my mattress. i'm not sure how to get it out of the pool.
If I slept with her my dick would come out glittery
coward.
Randomize