I just masterbated while imagining him getting hit by a truck. I have hit a completely unacceptable level of anger & bitterness. Help.
She looked at my facebook and decided to bump the security deposit up an extra 250...now we have to destroy the house, its expected and I wouldn't want to disappoint
josh has a chalupa in his pocket if you're hungry.
Didn't get the job. Searched for my references on FB and saw the pic of me weighing my head passed out.
Fake an illness. Her and her friends are like the female version of guys who wear tapout shirts
He's telling everyone that the only reason he's at this party is to hook up with me. SOS HELP.
What the fuck could you be doing in that room to make her yell "Beginners Luck!" over and over again?
so far, I've observed him try to hit on 3 girls, 1 guy and a bar stool. Humanity is amazing from a sober point of view.
When Vanessa's kindergarten teacher called me in because she was caught with her hand down some boys pants in the bathroom, I knew you babysat last week.
I fell asleep in the tanning bed, naked, for an hour and a half and I guess they couldn't wake me up so they called the fire department...and they came in while I was passed out naked...
Some girl is sitting topless in the kitchen and having a Skype video chat with some guy. I already like it here.
Let me be the vehicle for you to live out your slutty half-gay dreams.
You attempted what you called the "Long Island Heist", in which you shoved a half glass of Long Island down your pants and asked me to help you sneak it out. That drunk.
i just told him to get ready, because I'm going to be taking out my anger over the Super Bowl out on his penis.
Do I masturbate or eat a pound of matazah. Alissa help what do I do??
Randomize
