wat bout pragnant strippers??
Cool, see you soon... she just admitted to her friends that it was a queef.
it always starts out as a suggestion then three hours later I have cum in my eye.
Just saw a field sobriety test being administered at 730 am, I now know I do not have a drinking problem
The last thing i remember is saying breakfast beer and carrying the keg to my room and locking the door.
I literally saw him try to open a beer can with his anus. We need o step up our game.
him being a republican bothers me way more than his coke problem.
If I die tonight, I want you to have the rest of my nachos. And my porn collection.
FYI you are now my emergency contact at plan parenthood
Is being in jail an excusable absence?
put something nutritious in your body. AND NOT JUST THAT JOINT.
He told me that his greatest skill was making White Russians.
Of course, it's a law of friendship. "Thy friend Shalt always hold hatred for thine friend's swinish ex"
I tried to face swap with Chuck Norris. His face was too powerful... it broke my snap chat.
I'm trying to imagine how upset he was when he realized that he had been cockblocked by a picture of a sloth and I am drawing indescribable pleasure from it.
Randomize
