And now we're talking about squeezing babies out of vaginas...
I'm not looking forward to the waking up early part. Or actually the wedding part. Or the reception part. But I am looking forward to the meaningless sex with some random guy I meet at the reception part.
you're putting all your eggs in a very hungover basket
There's a girl in my class named "La-a" pronouced "Luh Dash uh" I hate everyone
You tired to make Beefaroni in the Mr. Coffee machine.
Well after last night it's official...I cannot die...it time to use this power for good instead of handle contests
his grandma walked in on us. twice. and he was truly fucking surprised when i put my pants back on.
I just got a nosebleed on a date at the cheesecake factory...
just run out of the bathroom with blood gushing down your face and scream "ITS IN THE CHEESECAKE!!!!!"
So much for doing Irish car bombs in my grandpa's memory.... Asshole.
I couldn't drink enough to fuck the friend, you said challenge accepted and stole some chicks shot.
The uberlube is also flammable
It's beautiful and huge. Like a dinosaur.
Woke up on my sisters couch, and it was like the start of a Terminator movie,my brother in law was passed out on the floor naked in the fetal position. We now call him Arnold. It was an epic night.
only 4 hours until nug lovin time
excuse me?
nug lovin. lovin nugs.
Punched myself in the face trying to open a bottle of Vicodin one handed. Night is going well.
Randomize
