Oh just a soda. I'm "driving"
I think that i just found proof that harry and ginny had sex
She texted me and said she was fingering herself. Don't respond to this because she's the perfect girl. I'd love to smell her cell phone after that.
I assume you meant to text someone else on your contact list instead of your own mother...
i think my mom would be mad if i was pregnant. last time i was she grounded me for a week.
i spelled "betch" that way on purpose, don't question my abilities as a drunk texter
he asked me to smell his eyeballs.
This is no lauging matter. Huge cock equals great sex. Marriage to huge cock equals great life.
I can't go to class, I have all this weed to sell
He literally cried into his tacos and screamed fuck bitches. Don't know if it was the best, or the worst hook up, ever.
we're spending all day in bed drinking spiked eggnog and fucking
Just once, I'd like to make it to my first wedding anniversary for a change.
I really need to get a comfy set of masturbating shoes
I was pretty pissed in the morning when I realized he had fucked the fake tattoo right off my chest.
Our orgasm ration was 1:45. No. Fucking. Joke. I thought I was going to die.
Taking one of the loudest shits ever at work and I have to say...I'm having a better time than I thought I would
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