Still drunk and leading the team through the 9am sales meeting. I'm pretty sure this is why there aren't more 26year-olds in management.
meet me or not, i'm out of control
Home. Barefoot. Drunk. Crying. Puked. Brushed teeth. Washed face. Dying. Need Cuddle.
Just witnessed my roommate pick her nose and eat it in her sleep. Remember, you made out with that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just saw a midget on a motorcycle. Best sight for a hangover ever.
I think we need to teach you what straight means again
Maybe it was that imaginary ghost dick you were stuffing in your mouth a minute ago
So. I need to gloat. I couldn't exactly tell my family that I won this game by deep throating.
So my mind was like YOU ARE TOTALLY GONNA MAKE IT TO CLASS TODAY but then my body was all LOL NO YOU AIN'T.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Got a minor my first day of college from the bike police. I'm gonna like it here
I'm disease and pregnancy free. This is an Easter for the books!
i swear i was one second from getting his number and then the shrooms kicked in
I woke up naked wrapped in a wolf blanket on the bathroom floor
I just want to order a very large pizza and get very drunk and very laid.
What's the protocol for doing tequila shots at a baseball game when you're chaperoning for a church group? You know, hypothetically.
Randomize