I bet they all look and smell like Amy Winehouse
90% of the problems in your life are directly related to your vagina
he can show you his cooooock\nshining, shimmering, splendiddddd
dude you had a hot girl interested and took shots together, as soon as it went down the hatch you upchucked on her entire existance..
successful birthday. 2012 rules
Well, now that you have a gf, its gonna be awkward when I get drunk and make out with you..... Then later, pretend like I don't remember.
My ex wife just asked to go over our divorce papers and for sex in the same text
The cop let me finish my J before he cuffed me. Coolest arresting officer ever.
I'm sure it's not the worst thing to ever come out of my ass
I knew it was going to be good when he took off my bra and I only realized 5 minutes later
My whole sorority girl exterior is just a lie. I'm a fat tumblr girl on the inside.
Just make it a game! Like 20 questions STD style.
We christened the whole apartment and fucked on the balcony. It was amazing. I'm 100% sure downtown heard me climax. Now we can unpack.
Honestly I am too high to watch videos of you jerking off right now
Questions: How did Rachel get home? Why did I find both her ID's in my shoes? And does anyone know if she's alive?
I have bruises everywhere an I broke the lamp. So ya I'd considerate rough sex.
Randomize
