she has a miserable personality but its a good think you dont have sex with that
pussy has no personality
Amen to that
I didn't cheat on him. Cheating means finding out. I made sure he was at work first. After the guy left I got shitfaced just so nothing seemed out of the ordinary when he came home.
Hate sex is AWESOME! I faked it, and when she fell asleep i came in her purse.
we found you standing over and eating out of my neighbor's garbage can
I wonder if I could sublet my bathtub to anyone.
What's the kids name that was drinking stale beer and redbull out of the blender?
I just walked in on my roommates playing baseball with old vegetables and a bigass knife.
I paid your cover too so you're on the list as tits mcgee. You're welcome :D
We kept trying to bring you to the hospital but you had a tantrum and kept saying you would never be Miss America
His parents know me as "the white shoed screamer"
It's called the dick transitive property. It states if you touch a person whilst they touch a dick, you are also touching said dick.
all we have is white fucking wine this is a travesty it's christmas not a fucking funeral
At least your road beer policy is responsible. Well, relatively speaking.
Donald Trump looks like someone photoshopped hair onto a dick pic.
Lets get drunk. But not too drunk that I can't work in the morning. But maybe drunk enough so we'll make out
Randomize
