i like that octo mom she is my favorite xmen
dude you just took shreks wife home. what the fuck is wrong with you
when a bears hungry he eats besides shes got her nipples pierced
no. i seriously look so gross with this sunburn. i wouldnt even wanna bang myself. and im really into myself.
ya and he came three minutes into it because he didnt have sex all summer
oh that makes more sense i knew you arent that good
I just beat off to a cartoon porn video. what has my life come to
I'm pretty sure this isn't my phone, but I do like these nude pics
I will pray to the gods of eye bleach for you
I figured out plans for New Year's and by figuring out I mean I've got a sugar bowl of cocaine. Start at 10?
I'm beginning to think the only reason I get laid anymore is girls are fantasizing sleeping with my dad...
The usual, im laying out. Ipod on shuffle, Large spray bottle to cool myself of and a smaller one filled with chilled vodka. I can spray the vodka right in my mouth without even opening my eyes. THIS IS LIVING....
Well we get the HIV results on my birthday haha. It'll be like happy birthday kid, you have AIDS.
I consider my hand a solid 5. So if I'm dipping below a 7.5, I might as well go with old faithful.
I just sang beautiful by Christina Aguilera to a kebab. This is what my life has come to.
The cop that got shot in the dick is here, let the entertainment begin.
I was going to say "wearing plaid doesn't make you gay, I wear plaid!" but then... heavy sigh
Randomize
