my last 3 google searches were anal itchy vagina and ice cubes
we may have ended up at a gay bar on accident. we're gonna work this to get free drinks.
I wish I had a frozen water bed.
best. idea. ever.
he put $150 on the cabs dash so 9 of us could pile in and ride 3 blocks to the apartment.
Fuck you. how could you leave me passed out hangin out my truck window when you knew it was starting to rain?
until he told me my vag was like a juicy apple and he loved eating it, yes, i really did think we were both sober.
Idk man, she was drunker than me and i was sitting there talking to a raccoon about it's broken leg.
I am here to underwhelm you with my vagina
I used to put Bugles on my penis and pretend it was a wizard.
And that is why we dont do tequila shooters at 1 in the afternoon. Because you go home with a beast like that
You've lost booty call privileges between the hours of 10pm and 8am.
He can kiss the multicultural 3 some goodbye
A respectable fucking: good but like I don't want to get kicked out of my hotel room
if you want the landscaping job, the uniform is a speedo. no exceptions.
God damn you Coronavirus! I'm jonesing I got the itch. I would fully satisfy a horse for some Taco Bell or Perkins. God help me I'm going insane but I definitely don't want to get sick.
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