): 100 percent naked, unless you count a tiara as clothing.
I seriously think I have a tan line on my stomach from getting a boner while in the taning bed.
You make shower sex sound like waterboarding
so jimmy johns showed up at our party last night. our house is sponsored now. living the dream.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She fell down no less than 4 times while we were at the club. One of which was while she was in the bathroom stall next to me.
I say we start a new tradition. I came up with it all by myself. It's called work out, lay out, black out
$645 later, she's throwing up in my washroom and asking for a cab. Hooker are soooo much cheaper.
Instead of getting a taxi some gay black guy drove us home. He is trying to break into the taxi business
Way to promote small business.
I would just like to point out that someone I had sex with drove me so I could have sex with you. I deserve some type of "most loyal booty call ever" award.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think my AA sponsor just booty called me.
I'm not sure why, but my salad smells like a Big Mac. Or maybe that's just the smell of yesterday's, seeping through my skin.
Helped a guy at work today that did nothing but stare at my chest....safe to say the Girls were looking G.O.O.D. today.
And don't worry, I have a great track record of rallying after a casual midday blackout.
I'm at forever 21 and someone pooped in the dressing room.
Remember that Czech tennis player I brought home from beer pong and banged on your couch last year? He just booty calle me. From the Czech Republic.
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