im about as happy as oj after his trial
She looks like Sash Grey but sounds like Fran Drescher. Advise.
I wish I loved anything like you love Tequila.
Watching a deaf couple have an argument in the mall. Can't bring myself to look away.
They were so slutty we had to play "rarely have I ever."
Ah that type of Dick. I think my phones trying to make me less of a whore by capitalizing Dick. That way it looks like I'm talking about a dude not penis
my hippie aunt just sent me some brownies with a note saying not to eat them under any circumstances until finals are over. excited.
Yeah but he's impersonating a gargoyle jumping off of everything. Including the walls.
Idk wtf I would do on a date. I thought wed passed that stage at least for a while. Nowadays dates should consist of blackouts and shameful mistakes.
I'm mentally preparing my vagina for this semester. It's fucking welcome week. I'm going to be talking to her all night.
I'm surprised I don't have a permanent face imprint between my boobs.
I just asked him what would happen if my boobs fought crime. I think I'm cut off.
Like you haven't hit rock bottom until you have had to throw your own turd out a window
i'm gonna crowd surf you onto his dick
Never let the horse trainer ride you, always ride the horse trainer. I have huge bruises on my thighs from his hip bones. That's how hard he rode me
Randomize
