So she farted while we were having sex but I was afraid she would stop because she was emberessed so i just went ahead and took the blame and apologized
I went for the touchdown every play, and I think I ended up with herpes.
you made cement angels. it was a great sight.
Please fuck him. And then let me tell her. And then let me protect you from the knife she pulls from her Ed Hardy purse. Please.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wish we were homeless so drinking on the streets was acceptable.
She finally woke up and said, "Me- nothing, potato peeler- 1." And rolled back over.
I just negotiated a blow job for an interview.
First off, get on bc solely in preperation for this event. Second, as my little sister you have a lot of whore to live up to.
I automatically know you're drunk now as soon as you start yelling in spanish
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Currently bleeding through my leggings. Not good. Not good at all.
Hospital.
I am invincible.
That's totally the Emoji for "just ran into some girl who knows I know she had an abortion"
He put a canoe in the lazy river at the water and started paddling away from security
This is gonna be a long day for my vagina and I
Our DD will meet us there. The strippers are sending a limo to pick him up. He promised them New Years Eve massages. Said he would still drive us home.
It’s the biggest dick I’ve ever seen. His IQ drops 25 points when he’s hard because there’s no blood going to his brain
Randomize