As a driver I hate pedestrians, and as a pedestrian I hate drivers, but no matter what the mode of transportation, I always hate cyclists.
Sometimes i wish my penis was detachable that way i could take it off sometimes so i wouldnt get into these situations
he ran me a hot bath. i thought i was in a pot and was going to be eaten. i was strangely ok with this
Nobody knew what to do when it was dead. You said fire up the George Foreman, I've never ate baby shark. She hasn't stopped crying.
I hate that he uses me for something other than sex. What does he think I am? His girlfriend? Ha.
Good idea. You gotta take care of your vagina. She takes care of you. Pay it forward.
Standards are awful. It's like living in the zombie apocalypse. You can only have sex with certain people
I believe I won the Golden Vodka Bottle of sadness last night for crying while being party boyed.
YOU DID DRUGS AFTER A THREESOME WHO ARE YOU TO JUDGE ME?!!?
I just don't do feelings in the summer months.
You just can't come from being "the girl who shit her pants."
I just messaged a senior at Harvard and told him to 'tinder me softly'
what a fun peer-pressure-filled weekend
MY HAND WILL BE UP HIS ASS IF HE DOES NOT APOLOGIZE FOR WHAT HE DID. IT WON'T BE THE GOOD-FEELING KIND OF "HAND-UP-ASS" EITHER.
Im so sorry for peeing on your chest.
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