This is even worse then that time I fucked a guy just because he had air conditioning.
The pregnant Hooters waitress told me to "make good choices".
I'm gonna take off my shirt and spin it around my head like petey Pablo so u can find us
We get an extra hour of sleep. That means we can take an extra shot tonight. Sound logic. Thank you daylight savings.
That UFC fighter fucked me so hard I have what can only be described as a "cuntcussion"
Why the fuck is he under my phone as Papi Chulo?
Really uncomfortable with the level of eskimo brotherhood at this family reunion
He says we're "annoying" but that's an odd word to describe a couple of heroic liquor saiyans
this case of pbr just wont end. i keep finding more.
Idk she didn't seem that weird to me but I had just eaten an entire tray of jello infused with liquor so I could be wrong...
He was Jesus for Halloween and I definitely got on my knees and gave him praise.
you were acting out moves from the wwe, in a dress. then you sceamed "you can't see me" and ran out of the apt.
How far are you from my house? Do I have time to masturbate before you get here?
He looked so uninterested when the stripper was slapping him. Now his roommates are harassing me about how crazy our sex must be.
true. but still. you know how big of a sucker i am for a penis and a pretty face.
Randomize
