So you coming over for some grilled cheese and head?
the party was called freshmen disorientation. i was just following the theme
Moral of the story: If you're gonna throw a glass of wine in a guy's face, don't do it in your own kitchen.
I was the king of the handle race. My team finished it in 56 minutes.
you don't get it. Nobody wins a handle race. there just degrees of losing.
He brought wine and beer. I'll put my pants on for wine and beer.
So much rum. So many feels.
It's hot as dicks out. Lets get drunk on the roof and make pterodactyl sounds at people.
you showed up at my door at 3am, handed me a bag of cold chicken nuggets and said "lead me to the non-irish Siobhans," do YOU think you were tripping?
Stop watching porn on my work computer.
STOP WORKING ON MY PORN COMPUTER.
Why am I cleaning the house twerking to anaconda wearing a bears jersey and helmet?
Remember when I got punched in the face on NYE last year? I don't
It's finals week and I'm halfway done with this bag of wine and don't plan on stopping. Say goodbye to my GPA
After you smoke one night. Just whisper in a barely audible voice, "Grey Poupon"
There's a possibility I may have hooked up with that British guy...
Possibility? You left the door open! Everyone saw!
Right after i got done cumming i sat back and gave a big Ric Flair "WOOOOOO!"
Randomize
