I vaguely remember telling people they were not trash cans
Because if the best sex I've ever had was with a gay guy, then God help me.
He was with one girl when I went to bed, wad with another when I woke up and now he just told me he was with a 3rd in-between last night and this morning. Jesus Christ.
This better be legit desert and not your penis alamode
Emergency! LinkedIn connected me to a hotornot hookup from sophomore year... slutty phase sphere has officially invaded grown up professional sphere. My illusions of interweb sexual anonymity have been exploded.
That's how you know it was a good night if two months later you finally realized your skirt never made it home and you found out where it was.
i asked him to talk to me in french while we fucked and halfway through i caught the word 'lasagna'. turns out he was making his grocery list.....i asked him to keep going.
I just watched videos of people getting puppies and crying, I cried too. Definitely still drunk
He's driving 2 hours to visit me and he's bringing weed. I love him so much.
It's like the hunger games, but we're gonna bone each other instead of kill each other
The married guy I've been fucking broke it off because I'm not a trump supporter and don't share his "traditional values".
For someone who claims to be straight, she knows a hell of a lot about bi erasure, and one Hayley Kiyoko song too many
Try to fuck my roomie AND steal my slippers: you are no longer my favorite cousin.
Dont ask questions just say words. where can i find plan b?
Can I borrow your pants?
WTH?
Just come to the men’s room and help me. The blonde bartender figured out I’m married. Rachel will definitely notice if come home pantsless
Randomize
