hahaha our party bus just died on the freeway and we're drinking in the center divider. i'm on the roof. i win
Everybody was literally kung fu fighting
you kept naming everything at the party...like "boy i'm going to make out with" and "table i'm going to dance on later"
I feel like I'm in a bed a bagels and mistakes.
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Bible prof is the guy I made out with at the gay bar on the fourth. He doesn't remember.
Weve literally been going out drinking five days a week. That counts as a full time job right?
Not a clue. But I did find out that his penis has a British accent.
Um...It has come to my attention that I may have said some rather vulgar things about Sean Connery to you and anyone listening last night, so...I apologize for that. I meant the things I said. But still. Sorry.
You were typing for me while I was hyperventilating into a paper bag on the floor.
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How'd the date with the redheaded dentist go?
She didn't like my gingervitis joke
Learn from my mistakes, you naive soul: Gay love triangles are just as dangerous as straight love triangles.
And then the night went full on bisexual.
Her cat was breathing in my ear all night, like that kid from Hey Arnold.
The shrooms were awesome. Everyone's bones in their face looked so beautiful! Everyone had great face structures.
She was blacked out at her own party. It felt good to stand next to her while she laid on the floor and say "vomit does not look good on you."
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