Joe is a total sociopath, I'm going to hook up with him tonight
he texted me telling him i gave him the clap. but i think he gave it to me and i gave it back to him
he came on my stomach and it was 1000 degrees in his car. i smelled awesome.
well on a positive note i hear those vitamins you take while pregnant do wonders for your nails
Shit stained towel. The very symbol of how much closer we are as friends. Fall 011... beautiful disaster
I've fallen from my one moral pedestal
ALMOST WRECKED MY SCOOTER. DAVE FRANCO HAS A TWIN AMD HE GOES HERE
College has done two things for me. Given me the confidence to blow my nose in public and shit in public
he came to me for relationship advice and we ended up fucking in my backseat
I was in a penguin suit. Dick out. I am confident in the value of my pic.
Well I mean he still had sex with me after I told him that I play fetch with the kids I take care of, so I'm not really looking too far ahead with him...
the quiet that you are hearing is a silent suggestion that you should go fuck yourself
Not at all! I'll let your potential employer know you have a huge dick
Dude, you were so drunk you were hanging from the ceiling of my car pretending you were a sloth while we were on 81.
I think she lost me at about the point where the words “Ice Cream Enema” were spoken.
Randomize
