He's married, but his wife isn't my neighbor so I don't feel bad about coveting him.
it wasnt like "sexy" or whatever. like...she was smiling just standing there butt ass naked
tasteful.
after he came i started crying. just to fuck with his head.
Alosmot hir two of of mt mailanoxwa
Oh Jesus.
yea, their son has been arrested on more than one occassion, their daughter is pregnant and their other daughter graduated but she was adopted, so clearly genes are everything.
We're going as conductors of the hot mess train and nobody rides for free
Our tip jar will say "just put the tip in, see how it feels"
Some old bald man is a 100,000 dollar Audi sports car just revved his engine at me and held out his phone at me trying to get my number. I hate the valley.
I just had a very enlightening conversation with my hat. we need more of whatever the fuck that was.
In my defense, who let the drunk girl run around with a sack of broken glass unsupervise?
On the plus side, I know I'm allergic to latex now. Like really fucking allergic
As much as I trust your struggle imma deal with being Eskimo brothers with my own sister before I get to that
Considering all of my stomach contents ended up in my center console, I'm a bit peckish.
I just bumped into this random I hooked up with a few years ago at Steve's party. Talk about a fingerblast from the past!
He brought me a bottle of Jack, got me off 3 times, & then left. This is the best fakelationship ever!
Stop saving videos when you’re using my pornhub account!!! My girlfriend just tried to finger my butt because she thinks I’m into that
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